In order for your relationship/marriage to be happily ever after, there are somethings that are vital for you & your partner to know & adhered to. They might seem easy and simple but they are the hardest sh$t ever to employ. Most relationships/marriages break because of simple things which if the couple could have known earlier how to handle themselves, regulate their behavior and best act for the mutual benefit of their relationship/marriage, they might be still together for eternity.

Whenever I have a fight, a problem or a nasty situation in my relationship; the first thing I remind myself is that we are two people with different upbringing. My partner is bring his 20+/30+ years full of different character, personality, approach and all the things he has seen, acted,learnt, believed and collected in all his years growing far away from me on the table and I’m also bringing all my 20+ character, attitude, beliefs, personality and all the crazy sh$t baggage on the table but still want to live happy together. Not unless we have some key things that act as a reminder or a reality check that we could act in reference to them, then it’s hard to coexist under the same roof.

It is not hard for your relationship/marriage to last unto your grey hairs, it only calls for a willing heart. A heart ready to love their partner through it all with these simple things that you should know to enable you act for the mutual benefit and growth of your relationship/marriage.

Remember relationship/marriage is not about tolerating each other but it’s all about loving, being happy and enjoying each other companionship to eternity.

You should know that :

1. Childhood wounds are not easily healed. They can only be healed through love.
2. Comments about physical features that can’t be changed are a waste of breath.Restrain yourself from such comments.
3. When to escape to an environment for undivided attention. It is always good to have some quality time alone with your partner.
4. How to remain the ‘best catch’ for your spouse. Be the person he/she fell in love with in terms of behavior and physical attraction. Look good for your partner and be in your best behavior too lest the spark dies.
5. When the warning light is on, its time to stop, check the engine, and make adjustments. Be alert.
6. Anger is not intrinsically evil….resentment is. Don’t let it reach the resentment level.
7. How to take responsibility for your action instead of blaming your spouse.
8. How to ignite passion. Know the right buttons to press.
9. How to face stressful events peacefully.
10. The importance of being straightforward and refraining from manipulation.
11. To recall constantly what first attracted you to your spouse.
12. True forgiveness goes beyond words to your actions.
13. How to stick together when your world falls apart. (an intensive article coming soon about this)
14. There are somethings about your spouse you simply can’t change.
15. The attractiveness of a positive attitude.
16. The value of hugging your spouse daily.
17. To pray for one another.
18. Anger impairs judgement and provokes harmful words.
19. A walk together is good for both the heart and the soul.
20. To speak well of your spouse; in his/her presence and absence.
21. To cut the edge of you tongue.
22. Behaviors that please your partner.

Part 3 coming soon still on Doug Fields book. If you have not read part 1, click on this link.

What are some other things vital for a relationship/marriage to survive? drop them in the comment box below.



  1. In both prt1 & prt2 you haven’t touched about finances; they are the major causes for divorce and breakups

  2. How to remain the best catch for your spouse inakuanga tricky sana, coz as years goes by your body changes, kids come in.. Hiyo time ya kupetypety hua inaisha

    • Lol, you can do it as long as you put your mind to it. If you have a strained time,then dieting will work best with you to keep your body in shape.


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